Saturday, October 23, 2010

Help Yourself

Everyone can use a little help; perhaps none more so than ourselves. This is why self-help/improvement books are every so often included in the bookstore’s bestseller list. A classic, “How to Win Friends and Influence People”, was a requirement reading for us back in high school. As I grew older, I found out that true friends are hard to come by and there are more valuable things we could strive for besides influence. When I started working, my brother lent me his copy of “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People”. I found its principles, well, effective, and many a time applied them for career growth. That being said, I realized that the book is lacking information when it comes to dealing with some, in my opinion, more important aspects of life. For instance, how does one create or perceive a “win-win” situation when faced with tragedy, like the death of a loved one? Later on, to better cope with office politics, a well-meaning friend recommended the book, “The 48 Laws of Power”. But after reading, I thought it is more accurate to label it “self-destruct” rather than “self-help”. It encourages a “win at all cost” mentality and the use of methods based on deceit in order to achieve goals. Not surprisingly, it has often been compared to the book “The Art of War”. While Sun Tzu’s treatise on warfare contains knowledge indispensable to military tactics, in the battlefield called “life”, I would rather pursue the “art of peace”. In my quest for personal advancement, I also took up Aikido and was introduced to its literature. Like most oriental martial arts, it emphasizes the importance of focus, balance and "centered-ness" in one’s life. However, with philosophical tenets derived from Shinto and Buddhism, it promotes beliefs (relativism e.g. “within divine love there is no good or evil…”) which are irreconcilable with my own. I believe that the pursuit of knowledge and self-improvement are essential, and hope none of my ramblings are taken to mean otherwise; however, I also think that unless they bring us closer to God, both are ultimately meaningless. I learned, for example, that the “7 Habits” won’t truly be effective without practice of the “7 Virtues”. Experience also taught me that for self-improvement, one need not look far in search of help. I started reading more of San Paolo and less of Paulo Coelho; more of the parables of the Messiah and less of the poems of "The Prophet"; more of the life of Christ and less of "The Purpose Driven Life"; and in doing so, I’m reminded, that a better self-help book than the bible, there is none.

All scripture is inspired by God and useful for refuting error, for guiding people's lives and teaching them to be upright.(2 Timothy 3:16)